I Blogged Myself

Why do you always come here? I guess we'll never know. It's like a kind of torture, To read this blog, y'know.

Welcome to the most sensational, inspirational, celebrational, Muppetational blog since Kermit left just a little bit of the swamp in his pants.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

About Face!

I created a Facebook page the other day. You can view it for yourself here.

Has anyone else got a Facebook page? Please feel free to link to mine and become a friend.

It's all just a bit of fun, really.


Monday, June 25, 2007

Collection: Kermit Culture: Perspectives on Jim Henson's Muppets

I received the following from a friend on 21st June - unfortunately a week or so after the deadline.

The things I could say!

I've emailed them anyway and asked if it's too late to send through a proposal ... I'll keep you posted.


Collection: Kermit Culture: Perspectives on Jim Henson's Muppets

{NAME WITHHELD} and {ANOTHER NAME WITHHELD} seek contributors for a collection of essays considering Jim Henson's Muppets.

All aspects of The Muppet Show and other productions or performances featuring the Muppets may be considered, although the editors particularly seek proposals for articles focusing on the original Muppet Show cast of characters. Papers may consider the various films featuring the Muppets, episodes of the original show, Muppets Tonight, appearances on The Ed Sullivan Show, particular characters from these programs, their significance as cultural icons, etc. This collection of essays will attempt to demonstrate the importance of The Muppets' influence and appeal, as well as their importance to popular culture studies as a whole.

Some potential subjects of interest include: consumption as recurring motif on The Muppet Show; commentary on stagecraft; the significance of the British-only sketches excluded from American broadcasts of The Muppet Show; representations of science; gender issues, voyeurism, nationhood and the representation of nationalism; literary adaptation in Muppet films; parody; images of the monstrous and deformity.

Proposals should be 150-200 words in length. Please include contact information with the proposal, including academic affiliation, if any. Please title the subject line of the proposal "Kermit Culture" to ensure speedy response, and include the proposal as the text of the email message as well as in attachment form.


The editors hope to have complete articles ready for submission to publishers by Fall 2007 and will be discussing the project with potential publishers as soon as possible.

Prospective contributors may send proposals or complete articles to:



(Please cc proposals to both editors!)


I really hope I can be a published author ... ESPECIALLY on this topic!

But then my dilemma will be: Do I tell you people that I succeeded in getting published (thereby unwillingly divulging my real name)? Or do I pretend they knocked me back (to maintain my anonymity)?


(What Would Kermit Do?)


Wednesday, June 20, 2007

The Power Of Advertising

Advertising is a powerful thing. It can even change history.


Monday, June 18, 2007

Damn Trespassers!

An elderly man in Queensland had owned a large property for several years. He had a dam in one of the lower paddocks where he'd planted mango and avocado trees. The dam had been fixed up for swimming when it was built and he also had some picnic tables placed there in the shade of the fruit trees.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the dam to look it over, because he hadn't been there for a while. He grabbed a ten-litre bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the dam, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.

When he got closer, he saw that several young women were skinny-dipping in his dam. He cleared his throat so the young women were aware of his presence, and they all scampered down to the deep end of the dam.

One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"

The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the dam naked."

Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the crocodile."


Thursday, June 14, 2007

Get OUT Of The Building!

We had a surprise fire drill at work yesterday. There's nothing like an unnecessary evacuation* just when you're in the middle of something important** to annoy you on a Wednesday afternoon.

But the fun part is we got to go down the fire escape and walk up the street a ways to congregate in front of some poor sod's house. Their dog went ballistic with the excitement of having 50+ strangers standing outside his front fence.

We didn't know the fire drill was going to happen, and one guy in particular was on the phone when the fire warden strode through the hallways, telling people to meet up in the kitchen so we could leave through the fire exit together. I’m not sure if that’s standard procedure (should we all be holed up in the kitchen instead of getting the hell out of the building? What if it’s a kitchen fire?), but we were all making jokes and mucking around about it anyway.

The guy who was on the phone wasn’t really aware of what was going on, so after about ten minutes outside, the exercise was deemed a success and we all piled back up the stairs. Only then did we discover On-The-Phone Guy wandering aimlessly around the halls, perplexed as you like, obviously wondering where everyone had gone.

I joked that he’d missed the Rapture.

But it got me wondering: Should On-The-Phone Guy start to worry about his value at the firm? Is he really that unimportant? Not only did the fire wardens fail to get him off the phone and joining us in the kitchen, but they forgot about him when we all headed down the fire stairwell and no one thought about him when the drill was declared a ‘success’.

If I were him, I’d be worried that no one liked me – or that they were content to let me perish in the flames (should a fire ever start).

The funny thing is I used to be Chief Fire Warden in my old job, so I know perfectly well the importance of fire drills and proper evacuation practice-runs. Maybe I should throw my (shiny red) hat into the ring and offer to be a warden here as well.

It might mean the difference between a real evacuation success story, and the odd unfortunate employee ending up in freshly-baked crispy bite-sized pieces.

* Not a euphemism.

** I was blogging.


Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Sweetums Update # 6

Since the last Sweetums Update, things have been progressing well. The little guy is now kissing our faces (even making a soft 'tt' sound with his tongue to emulate the 'smack' of a real kiss - he copies the noise because that's how it sounds when we kiss his face), and whenever we wave at him and say, "Bye-bye, Sweetums!" as he's being taken out of a room, he waves back and smiles.

His waves are full-on waves (his whole hand really goes to town on it, and sometimes his whole arm gets involved as well), and he gets really excited - although that's probably due to the over-the-top reaction his waves get from us.

But perhaps most thrilling of all (particularly for his adoring – and adorable – parents) is his recent decision to engage us in conversations. It doesn’t matter (to him or to us) that the conversations make no sense; the point is that he’s communicating with us and is so earnest about it. With his eyes wide open, his arms gesturing about wildly and his voice raise in excitement, he babbles incoherent thoughts at us as if he’s telling us the most important and intense story ever told.

It’s lovely.

The fact that he’s so eager to talk to us and is wholeheartedly enthralled in his own storytelling is beautiful; the notion that he thinks we understand him is wonderful; and the idea that he will one day learn to speak in proper sentences to better get his thoughts across is sobering.

What if he decides to never shut up?!!

The fact of the matter is that Sweetums is currently staying with Wifey and my outlaws “down the coast”, while Wifey conducts her three weeks of rounds. I miss them. I’ve spoken to Wifey each night on the phone, and heard Sweetums babbling in the background, but all his precious photos on my screensaver at work make me a little teary because I miss him (them) so.

They’ll be back for the weekends, but three full working weeks without them is an interesting notion. Sure, it’s great to revisit my carefree bachelor days (ie, I won’t be cleaning up after myself until Friday night), and the full night’s sleep has been a shock to my system, but I’ve also grown accustomed to arriving home from work in time to give Sweetums a ‘Daddy cuddle’ and a bath.

I should also point out that I’ve taught him to beat his palms on the tray of his high chair to the tune of the following chant: “Where’s my dinner! Where’s my dinner! Where’s my dinner!”

Wifey thinks it’s hil-ar-i-ous