I Blogged Myself

Why do you always come here? I guess we'll never know. It's like a kind of torture, To read this blog, y'know.

Welcome to the most sensational, inspirational, celebrational, Muppetational blog since Kermit left just a little bit of the swamp in his pants.

Monday, May 15, 2006

What A Stupid Mother

I'm sorry, but the Big Brother Eviction show last night did nothing but further highlight the density that is Karen Forscutt.

She completely didn't understand a word host Gretel was saying as Ms Killeen ran through the EVICT and SAVE options on the voting (how vague did she look?!). She didn't comprehend the point Gretel was trying to make about (the majority of) Michael's odd behaviour being due to his role as The Insider (after Gretel told her the news about this, Karen still said "he was all up-and-down" and she didn't like him; no concept of the fact that this was due to what Gretel had just told her*). And the vacant stare continued as she answered every other question Gretel put to her. (The throwaway comment from Gretel that many of the Housemates look in the mirror all the time seemed to be lost on Karen, who was one of the worst offenders of this behaviour.)

She was in it for the money and prizes. Well, I hope she's happy with the measly $2,000 and two mobile phones. And the pair of fluffy slippers. Cos that's all she's gettin'.

BTW, I think it's great that even Gretel feels the prizes this year are too stingy. She's adding to them herself, possibly out of sympathy or guilt. Anything she can find lying around in her dressing room gets brought on stage and given to the evicted Housemate. Last week it was a couple of pieces of fruit, this week it was her slippers. Maybe next week it'll be a hair extension or some make-up (because, let's face it, at this rate it's going to be another female who gets evicted).

So tomorrow night three Intruders are going in to the House. Two on the Big Brother show, and the third on Rove Live (what a shameless cross-promotion!). We didn't learn much about them on last night's show, but by getting out there and investigating the matter fully**, I can reveal to you all that the Intruders' names are Rob (the gay hairdresser from Sydney - a perfect match for David I don't think!), Danielle and Jade. They seemed pretty tame in their little video introductions (all hot air and nothing too interesting about them), but hopefully they prove me wrong.

The Three Intruders.
From left: Danielle, Rob and Jade.

Also on tomorrow night's show, Michael will be unmasked to the House as The Insider. I guess this is because the Intruders already know about his role as saboteur and it wouldn't have stayed a secret, but I must say: I'm not impressed, BB. First off, the guy was put-upon by having this role thrust on him; he didn't ask for it and it clearly changed the way he looked at and played the game. Then he has to do all these crazy things that only cause friction inside the House. This would all be alright if the hosts of the BB shows were more supportive of him! On many occasions in these past three weeks, Gretel Killeen, Bree Amer and Ryan 'Fitzy' Fitzgerald have bagged him out publicly. Yes, I agree that Michael's attempts at skull-duggery and detective work leave a lot to be desired. But he never claimed he was a subtle crafty kind of guy, so attacking him for the crime of being less-than-brilliant at these tasks isn't fair at all. But when these three hosts (Mike Goldman has been his only supporter) turn on him, the sheeplike public do as well, and before you know it, someone who entered the House to play it a certain way had the odds stacked up against him from the start, which effectively sentenced him to a public beating and early eviction. Now revealing him to the other Housemates (especially after his little 'Reuben' stunt, which I actually thought was the smartest way he could have played it, although he went a little too far with some aspects of his story ... some of his Housemates are going to be very unimpressed when they find out the truth) is going to seal his doom once and for all, whether he gets a week's immunity from eviction or not.

The show will also be a lot less fun from now on without his Insider antics to keep us entertained. Will they come up with something else to hold our interest? I hope so, for their sake. Because so far, I think they've botched up quite a lot of stuff this year.

And this from someone who considers themself a fan!

Tune in tonight to see if Michael gets eight other Housemates to nominate him or not. I hope he does; if he doesn't and gets nominated, the public will probably vote him out once his secret is revealed on Tuesday (because he won't seem as interesting anymore, only irritating), and I'd like to see him stick around for a while longer so he can start to be himself.

If it turns out he's exactly the same, or even more of a tool, then by all means: get rid of him. But let's give him the same chance everyone else in there has already had to win us over, yeah?

PS - Happy Mother's Day to Karen. And to my Mum, whose 'European Vacation' is ending in a couple of days. Safe travels to you and Dad, and we look forward to hearing all about your trip when you get home. xx

* Although, to be fair, the show's producers stuffed this up in a major way by not showing the clip as part of the show like they did last week for Tilli and Elise. Instead, they put it up as they came back from an ad, and Karen missed most of it and wasn't filled in properly by Gretel afterwards. Plus, we didn't get to see her face as she learned that Michael had been upset about the revelation of Karen & Krystal's pre-existing relationship because he'd been under instruction to uncover the ruse or be up for nomination himself. None of these contributing factors were made clear to her, and of all people, her reaction was one I would have loved to have seen. I felt very robbed.

** Okay, so I read it on Wiki.*** I also learnt that both Ashley and John's real first names are Michael! No wonder BB gets the two of them confused! Neither of them are using their real names!

*** Hmm, I also just noticed that their details are up on the official BB website. So much for keeping the mystery alive until their official entry into the House, guys!



At Monday, May 15, 2006 8:12:00 am, Blogger Kymmy said...

I simply cannot deal with Rob's eyebrows. It's going to prove too much of a distraction for me.

At Monday, May 15, 2006 9:14:00 am, Blogger sheriff of nothing said...

I was thinking the prizes were a bit stingy too - BUT the Friday night games prize that can be selected from one of the boxes is a winner.
Really why should they get a car for living in a house for a few weeks - sunbaking and sleeping and really doing not much? Let them earn it!

At Monday, May 15, 2006 9:28:00 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Howdy Bevis,

I have had a few goes at this now without luck, so I am hoping that on this occasion the advice will be heeded and I will be able to leave a post.

This is "Sonny" from City of Angels... (that should hopefully do it).

How are you? Good I hope. Nic and I have been thinking of both Wifey and you, hope all is going well in the pregnancy department.

I was reading your comments re BB. Hopefully someone as entertaining as Michael will be retained.

I too have noticed that the hosts seem to attack Michael. My theory is that this is done pursuant to a management directive to demonise him, being consistent with the theme of the "bad guy" on the show. That is alot to stomach given that at no stage did he ask to assume the role of "Insider". Time will tell as to whether the public sees him in the same light I guess.

Well, must be off.

Hope all is progressing well.


At Monday, May 15, 2006 10:19:00 am, Blogger Susanne said...

Great post Bevis.

I like Michael, and I love the whole 'I have a kid' thing.

This year they seem to be working really hard to create character types out of the contestants- e.g. the Revenge Room casts Camilla and Anna as bitchy, and being the Insider makes Michael appear like a back-stabber and a liar, even though this is his 'role'.

It's pretty easy to see through this, but I suppose it must be hard to try and keep viewer interest in a sixth series.

My interest is certainly waning.

I'm glad Karen is gone though. She's just so stupid!

At Tuesday, May 16, 2006 10:43:00 pm, Blogger sublime-ation said...

I like Michael too. Personally I am really annoyed at Big Bother making everyone 'clarify' in their voting, it's fucking frustrating and annoying...and he's not even right when he says 'you are not being clear'.

At Thursday, May 18, 2006 12:48:00 am, Blogger BEVIS said...

Kymmy, ever since I saw this comment of yours, I have been unable to concentrate on any other part of him or his personality! Thanks for that!! :) Seriously, I think they look awful too, and I can't believe he listed them and his smile as his best features.

Sheriff of Nothing, true - and they get out of having to make good on all of them by getting the winning Housemate to choose between three boxes, thereby having most weeks come up without a prize (thanks to the law of averages). Three weeks down, and no major prize has been given away yet. The holiday sponsor is still getting their promos in, but no one's having to part with any actual overseas trips yet. A piece of cheese, a novelty bow tie and free laundry services are the only prizes they've had to come through with. Not really a stretch for the show's budget, eh. Clever way to still offer big prizes but not have to give them all away. I agree with your "let them earn it" sentiment. Oh, and I just remembered the other prize that has been struck from last year's eviction package: A spa treatment. Remember that? Upon eviction, each Housemate received $2,000 from VISA, two 3 mobile phones, a spa treatment package thanks to that beauty/haircare product that was a mjor sponsor last year, and a car. I wonder if the prizes will 'step up' (after five weeks or something) to include a holiday/spa treatment package, and then 'step up' again so the last few evicted Housemates will still get a car.

Hi there, MS! No worries on the comment this time; thanks for trying again! Wifey and I are doing well. I could probably do with a job about now, and Wifey's starting to feel the discomfort of her pregnancy, but otherwise all is good, thank you. I like your points about Michael being entertaining. Yes, I really don't want him to be evicted for a while yet (if at all). Your theory that 'this is done pursuant to a management directive to demonise him' is so great (and well-worded); I'm sure that's it exactly.

Susanne, thanks for that! :) You have also highlighted a very accurate observation about the producers' tactics in 2006. Make stereotypes for us to 'boo', etc. I've been staggered by the support for Karen in the outside world. It may not be much, but considering the stupid, insipid and vain daughter she produced, I think it's far more than she deserved.

Sublime-ation, was that a typo? Or is 'Big Bother' your cute little name for Big Brother? Either way, you should claim that it was intentional! I like it! And yes, during nominations, when BB has said, "You're not being clear," I've often said, "Yes he/she is!" aloud to the telly. Although most times I know why he says it. He wants the reason to be re-stated in a neat little soundbyte that can be incorporated into the mini-second montages they put together for viewing later. Better to have a two-second summary saying "He's deceitful" than a thirty-second description saying, "He says one thing but does another and then tells everyone else something different and I can't trust him and he lies and I don't want to spend the rest of my time in the House with someone like him". What BB should really be saying is "Be concise" where he generally says "You're not being clear". That's the real reason behind it, but yes - it makes BB sound like he's the idiot!

At Thursday, May 18, 2006 9:20:00 pm, Blogger noshie said...

When this happened I never thought twice about it...
Adie came home from Hampton Court a few weeks ago asking if your family were English because he saw what could have been your uncle wandering around the castle. I said thatI doubted your family hailed from this part of the world, at least not living family and forgot about it.
Ten minutes ago Adie sent me a text message... did your parents perhaps go to Hampton Court during their time in the UK? Adie thinks he saw your dad!

At Tuesday, May 23, 2006 3:31:00 pm, Blogger BEVIS said...

Noshie, yes - Adie has emailed me about this as well. I forwarded it to Dad and he said it all made sense now about the guy smiling at him like he knew him. Adie should have said something! Dad realises now who it was, but at the time it didn't occur to him. How funny and bizarre is that! You're all on the other side of the world and happen to be in the same place in the UK (where there are just a few people, I'm told) at the same time! Hilarious!


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