I Blogged Myself

Why do you always come here? I guess we'll never know. It's like a kind of torture, To read this blog, y'know.

Welcome to the most sensational, inspirational, celebrational, Muppetational blog since Kermit left just a little bit of the swamp in his pants.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Six Things I Hate About Me

Fellow blogger Richard Watts took it upon himself to tag me a couple of weeks ago.

And so hereunder I am making good on my promise to get to it eventually. :)

I have to tell you six things I hate about myself, and then I have to tag six other bloggers to do likewise. (Whether they actually do or not, is totally up to them.)

Six things I hate about me:

1) My skin (particularly on the back of my neck).

2) My complete lack of faith in myself (ooh, we're gettin' serious now!).

3) My weaknesses (nuh, that's all you're getting on that one).

4) My health (I'm not exactly a fitness guru).

5) My back (specifically my lower back).

6) My inability to come up with six things I hate about myself (no, really).

You want me to break it down a little? Okay, how about this:

1) My skin: Thanks to the cystic acne I had on my back, shoulders, chest, neck and scalp as a teenager (yeah, sound great, doesn't it - you should have seen it ... or better still, lived it), and the severe medication (Roaccutane; any fellow sufferers out there? Everyone else, check out the list of side effects on that link, which doesn't even cover them all) that I was put on to counteract the massive painful pus-filled boils that would form and erupt on the above parts of my body on a dialy basis, I now have pock-marks and scar tissue on each of these areas, but it's worst on my neck. Not only that, but my skin is still prone to bouts of pimples and even the odd (thankfully painless) pus-filled boil like old times. Ahh, those were the days. To make matters worse, the Roaccutane had many awful side effects. As well as the ridiculously-peeling lips, tinea and dermatitus, I suffered through four or five 45-minute nose bleeds per day (it was like a running tap and wouldn't stop). Another side effect was my premature baldness (which in turn prevents me from even being able to grow my hair over the scarred and embarrassing scalp and neck), and of course my tendancy to burn like a buttered roll if I'm in the sun for even a short period of time. Not a pleasant description, eh? (Well, you had the choice of sticking with the brief version!) ... btw, I've always been very thankful that the cystic acne never spread to my face - possibly due to the Roaccutane!

2) My complete lack of faith in myself: Such as, ohhh, I dunno ... maybe in looking for and finding myself a damn job! ... Not that this is all that's standing in the way of me getting a new job. I also seriously don't know what I want to do next. And if you think I'm happy not knowing, you're oh-so-very-wrong about that. Additionally, I have very real issues with the idea of working for someone else (after how I was treated by the managers at the last place I worked for), and although this basically means I either work for myself or I stay unemployed (or I just get over it, which I'm working on), I'm hoping I'll think up that million-dollar idea that will mean I can work for myself and do well at something I love. We'll have to see, though. Those million-dollar ideas don't come around too often, I hear ...

3) My weaknesses: No, I said that's all you're getting on that one! (Nice try, though.)

4) My health: I'd love to start eating well and ensure that I had a good chance of being here for my as-yet-unborn child's 21st birthday (and possibly when they have kids), but the idea of giving up a full-time diet of Coke, doughnuts, burgers, chocolate and pizza somehow doesn't appeal.*

* Kidding.**

** Mostly.

5) My back: I'm talking about the pains I get in my lower back. It comes partly from bad posture, but mainly from putting my back out one day at work about four years ago and needing chiropractic work done on it. Once the WorkCover payments ran out, I couldn't afford to continue the treatment "on my own dime" (not that we have dimes over here), so my back now just aches and throbs and prevents me from being able to do any heavy lifting (or play any rough sports -- not that I needed an excuse to get out of that kind of activity!).

6) My inability to come up with six things I hate about myself: Seriously, I'm a self-loather from way back. What's with me not being able to come up with more than five things I hate about me? (And a couple of of those five were scraping the bottom of the barrel, anyway!) I think there are a lot of minor points wrapped up in points 2 and 3, so maybe I used sweeping statements for those examples, and covered a lot of ground there. Still, does it sound like I'm full of myself if I can't think of a sixth thing I hate about myself?

On trying to think of a sixth item to list above, I've realised I actually think quite highly of myself in many areas. So very shortly I'm going to create a tag that lists six things I love about myself, to follow and accompany this one. Feel free to go with both tags, if you like.

And now I tag:

Drowning In Jello
Her Radicalness

If tags aren't your thing and you're not interested in completing this tag, it's no skin off my nose at all - please don't feel obligated to do it. If you're happy to complete the tag (especially if you want to self-tag), please let me know in the comments so we can all go and check out your answers!

Good one. Hopefully we can come clean about our own self-loathing and make the world a better place, just like the song says.

Just try to keep the list to six, if you can. :)



At Tuesday, May 02, 2006 8:16:00 am, Blogger Riss said...

Regarding point 2, I found the tools on monster.co.uk to be very helpful for me to determine where my strengths lay, what type of work I enjoyed (yes, enjoyed) doing and gave me more focus. Check out the section on Career Advice and it might help you to find a job that you can visualise yourself doing that is right for you.

Remember, every employer is different - you not only have to find a job that suits you but an employer to match. I think that you need to be challenged in your work and you probably need to choose something that will extend your skills and give you opportunities for growth as well as providing personal satisfaction in a job well done.

You know I'm here if you want help.

At Tuesday, May 02, 2006 10:25:00 am, Blogger Rowena said...

BEVIS, I'm concerned as to why you decided to tag me with this one. Is it because you think I'm the kind of person who would hate themselves? Or worse, SHOULD hate themselves? My imagination's running wild...

(Funnily enough, my paranoia will be on my six things list ;) )

At Tuesday, May 02, 2006 3:03:00 pm, Blogger Susanne said...

As far as your blog goes, Bevis, you don't have any reason to lack faith in yourself- lots of people read it and it's and entertaining.

At Tuesday, May 02, 2006 5:14:00 pm, Blogger Rowena said...

Roaccutane is so scary, but unfortunately it's the only thing that is really effective in combatting acne.

Have done the meme now.

At Tuesday, May 02, 2006 6:57:00 pm, Blogger Ang said...

Since I so thoughlessly left you hanging with your last tag, I might...just might, steal this one -and your modified one sounds mighty interesting too...

At Wednesday, May 03, 2006 7:12:00 am, Anonymous Her Radicalness said...

wow i just realised that the link i've been posting in here as my site was spelt wrong. this one is fixed.

At Wednesday, May 03, 2006 4:24:00 pm, Blogger BEVIS said...

Riss, thanks for that. I'll check out the site. I appreciate your advice / kindly words, as always. :)

Rowena, please don't think that me selecting you was meant to mean anything quite so sinister! I assure you I was just looking through my list and thinking about who I hadn't heard from and/or visited for a while, and who did and did not like completing memes (as far as I could recall). I knew from past memes that you'd be a good one for thoughtful answers (and I was right!).

Susanne, that's a lovely thing to say - thank you! If only I could turn my blog into a major source of income (without resorting to ads). May you have blue skies, green lights and fluffy white pillows in your future. :)

Rowena, you sound like someone who knows. And of course, you're right. Unfortunately it's all that'll work against the most severe cases.

Ang, that'd be wonderful! (I remembered the last tag and your lack-of-response when I was considering who to tag with this one, so I thought it meant you weren't into them - maybe it was just your blog dying on you or something.) I'll check back to see if you've done it.

Her Radicalness, really? I always use the link I've got on the main page of my blog to get to yours, anyway. Glad it's all sorted, though.

At Wednesday, August 16, 2006 8:50:00 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hi there
just came to this site looking for people who hate stuff about themselves,but shocked to see only 6 things,well...i can write a book on the stuff i hate about myself
havent really gone through the stuff written about else than the first blogs
cant we start off something with the craziest things or the blunders we have done in our so called thingi " life "
guess will be kinda cool


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