I Blogged Myself

Why do you always come here? I guess we'll never know. It's like a kind of torture, To read this blog, y'know.

Welcome to the most sensational, inspirational, celebrational, Muppetational blog since Kermit left just a little bit of the swamp in his pants.

Monday, November 28, 2005


I'm feeling a bit glum today, but this is probably because of the GIGANTIC wedding event yesterday of Fabian and his diminutive wife. For whom I now have a name: Lovely Lovely.*

The wedding itself was magnificent, and they were both very teary, very beautiful, and very much in love. I videoed the whole thing (I estimate that in 7 and a half hours, there was a total of somewhere between 45 minutes to an hour where I wasn't holding a video camera to my face - which means that I have very sore arms today!), and I hope to edit it all together for them so they can have a rip-roaring wedding DVD to keep always and remember their special day.

Fabian cried - he's a big girl.

Anyway, they're off now on their honeymoon of joy**, and I daresay we won't be hearing from them for a few weeks now.

But getting back to the point, having experienced such an emotional high of a day could be contributing to the 'glum' feeling I have now. But it could also have to do with all the nasty, vindictive, workplace-bullying crap that's going on around here in the office today.

It's enough to make anyone feel like junk.

I know I still owe you Part 6 of my TV Addiction multi-post, but I'm just not feeling up to completing it today. It's mostly finished, but needs to be wound up. Or, for Clokeeeey's benefit, it parked the minibus but had to go and get change for the parking meter. It should be back any day now.

I'm going to go home to Wifey, now. She always cheers me up by being so wonderful and beautiful and gorgeous and loving and caring and sexy and very sexy and supportive and splendid and clever and wise and we're going to watch Neighbours together.

* Which is something she says a lot.

** And sex.


At Monday, November 28, 2005 11:14:00 pm, Blogger auburn said...

i HATE nasty vindictive workplace bullying.

The rest of that was beautiful...your wife is lucky to be so adored:)

At Tuesday, November 29, 2005 5:08:00 am, Blogger meghansdiscontent said...

Thank you for giving us singles some hope! It's always wonderful to read about people who are so in love . . your friends, your wife and you are extremely lucky!! CONGRATS all around!

At Tuesday, November 29, 2005 8:47:00 am, Blogger BEVIS said...

Thank you both for those kind words. Wifey really is one of a kind.

Just like her twin sister.*

* Not really; I'm just stealing one of Captain Dingbat's gags, there.

At Tuesday, November 29, 2005 9:09:00 am, Blogger sheriff of nothing said...

Yay for happy weddings.
Isn't it such a great feeling knowing that you can go home to that person that makes EVERYTHING all better!
Yay for being in love.

At Tuesday, November 29, 2005 10:50:00 am, Blogger elaine said...

So what is happening on Neighbours?

Is Lovely Lovely dimunitive, as in small in stature?

Hope you're feeling less glum today.

At Tuesday, November 29, 2005 9:09:00 pm, Blogger MelbourneGirl said...

hey bevis. you are ace. about neighbours, we missed it tonight (tues) and princess doesn't know yet i forgot to tape it.

what happened?

also, she is working on her guest post. it's about animals.

At Tuesday, November 29, 2005 10:53:00 pm, Blogger BEVIS said...

Sheriff, I agree. Big yays all round.

Elaine, hey there. Lovely Lovely is (shall we say) short. Tiny. Dwarfish. Miniscule. Yes, small in stature.

(Hmm, possibly not 'dwarfish', actually.)

She's quite 'Lovely Lovely', though.

My day today started off OK but rapidly went downhill and caught up with yesterday's glumness. However, Litle Faerie Girl posted the first half of her review on the mixed CD I sent her, so that cheered me up a lot. But then I had to negotiate with a couple of nasty representatives of management on behalf of a bullied workmate, so the shine quickly went out of the day.

MG, I'm not sure what I did to deserve that compliment, but thank you! I am SOOOOOOO looking forward to Princess' guest post! It's gonna rock! :)

As for Neighbours, ... well! (I can't believe either of you ladies asked me that question! I thought you were smarter than that.)

*clears throat*

Dylan and Stingray have been locked away for 10 and 5 years respectively for a crime they were forced to commit by bad-boy Roo (Stingray's life was being threatened unless Dylan commited a robbery, and then both were threatened not to 'dob' Roo in) after Roo called the cops on the boys. They have been placed in a minimum security prison.

While trying to survive 'on the inside' (and no, I'm not afraid to use that term), Stingray's diet has regressed to unhealthy junk, just like in his earlier ADD days, causing him to bounce off the walls with altogether-too-much energy and cause a scene. It was everything Dylan could do to keep Stingray from being beaten up by the other inmates. Thankfully for Stingray, he found a 'talent' in fixing broken appliances, starting with the boys' own shared TV set (which was broken until Stingray fixed it). He progressed to swapping repairs for chocolate bars, magazines, and other 'perks' around the prison; the spoils of which he gave to Dylan to thank him for looking out for Stingray 'on the inside'.

Meanwhile, Paul Robinson managed to track Roo down, and while a couple of handy thugs-on-standby ensured that Paul had Roo's undivided attention, Paul told Roo that he'd give him $25,000 (and showed him the cash in a suitcase) for turning himself in to the police and confessing to the whole scam, and another $25,000 after the Timmins boys were released. This money would be given to someone Roo trusted so Roo wasn't stupid enough to spend it straight away himself. Either way, Paul was going to have Roo arrested within minutes, so if Roo wanted a clear conscience, $50,000, and Paul not to come looking for him for the rest of his life, Roo was 'strongly advised' to accept the terms of Paul's very generous offer.

Roo was then taken to the same prison where the Timmins boys were being held, and (naturally) all the other thugs 'on the inside' turned out to be Roo's best pals. He and Dylan got into a fight, which resulted in Dylan being taken away to solitary confinement, and apparently dashing his hopes for Paul's plan (of which the Timmins boys knew nothing, obviously) to come to fruition. But it might still all come to light; who knows. Either way, the Timmins boys are now back to being threatened en masse by all the inmates 'on the inside', and neither one can protect the other any more.

When the Timmins family came to visit, they told the boys of Paul's plan (which Paul had told them before they left Ramsay Street for the prison), but it was too late - Dylan realised that his fight has shot their only chance at freedom to hell. (I don't necessarily buy that, however.)

Harold, meanwhile, has still been unable to properly grieve for the loss of David, Liljana and Serena. Lou (who's been living with him) and Sky have been trying to coerce him to stop working at the General Store all day and then volunteer (with a guilt-ridden Connor) with the Salvos all night (which Harold is clearly doing so that he doesn't have to face his grief), but he keeps pushing Lou and Sky away. He finally cracked it with both of them tonight, kicking Lou out of his house and warning Sky that he'll do the same to her if she continues not to allow him to "live his life the way he wants to live it" or some such rubbish.

Janelle and Kim (the Timmins parents) have recently gotten back together, and their constant smooching and even love-making in Kim's comby van out in the street have been embarrassing to Janae. Boyd found it amusing, however.

That reminds me, I think we finally catch up with Summer next week (Max's daughter and Boyd's sister who was shipped off on a "music scholarship" earlier this year when the actress was finding it hard to commute from Geelong to Melbourne for filming - according to Riss). Is she returning so she can be written out of the show altogether? Is she back just for a little while? Or is she back for good?

Moving on, Karl has been dumped by that Jenny chick he was dating (who he met through the Internet - ain't it a great place to be?!), because she could tell that he wasn't over Susan. When he told Max this, Max told him to tell Susan, which he did, and then he followed this up with the decision that he (Karl) and Susan shouldn't be friends anymore, for their own good. Susan was a bit surprised but okay with this at first, but when re-telling the story to Lyn and Steph later, Lyn in particular fired her up to get all self-righteous about it and tell him to sod off because she was looking afer herself now.

(Most of the viewing audience, however, cheered when Karl finally admitted to himself what the rest of us have known for two years now - that he still loves Susan. Now if only she'd realise the same thing ...)

(Karl haters would be the exception to the above, presumably.)

As for Susan herself, she and Alex (her new beau, cancer-ridden though he is) recently had an argument about Alex's eldest child, the recently revealed daughter whose name I forget for the moment, who the family had been keeping quiet about (and explains the furtive glances the two kids had been giving each other last week - as I predicted, it was another sibling whose very existance was a skeleton in their cupboard). Susan was won over eventually and Alex told his kids that they'd look for their sister and try to patch things together if she'd let them.

Elle Robinson & Ned Parker have been getting closer and closer (more with Elle's insistance and stubborn refusal to see that he's not interested in her), and Ned recently told Gino (the gay hairdresser and director of the play Ned and that prissy actor were both starring in) that Prissy Boy was pretending to be interested in Gino to get the lead role, but was in actual fact living with his girlfriend and leading Gino on. Gino fired Prissy Boy and presumably kept Ned in the show (I might have missed a bit here).

I think tomorrow we find out (finally) that Ned is illiterate. I'm not sure if it's been stated outright yet, but the clues have been there for weeks, so I personally don't think it's been hard to figure out. But then, I'm pretty-much a genius, so ...

Steph, who loyal viewers may recall once loved Drew Kirk (her best friend Libby's deceased husband whose death was caused by a horse riding accident three years ago - Libby is Karl & Susan's daughter), but the feelings weren't reciprocated. Well, yesterday Steph started having slightly-haunting dreams (if the music was anything to go by - and it generally is) of Drew flirting with and kissing her. Forget about poor old devoted husband Max! Is Steph suddenly now suffering from dreams brought on by old feelings of unrequited love re-surfacing in her subconscious? Is she bored with Max? Is there a problem with the baby she's carrying? Or is her cancer about to return? What does it all mean??

Lyn Scully & Joe Mangel finally decided to call it quits (at least for the time being). As I recall, the last 'ocker' Joe she was involved with left for a short term and never came back, so maybe this is the last we'll be seeing of Joe Mangel. (He may return, though.) Still, his is the last of the special guest spots from their big "20th Anniversary Week" about five months ago to have finally edged his way back out of the show. It took a while! Although Drew Kirk's resurgence indicates to me that they may not be finished with their special guest surprises yet. More blasts from the past to come? We'll have to wait and see.

Finally, the mobster who Paul was convinced was trying to kill him with the bomb on the aeroplane and the poisoned letter was found dead a few streets away from Ramsay Street, supposedly as he was on his way to harm Paul, Elle and/or Izzy again, leaving all Ramsay Street residents to believe that:

(a) The threat is over; and
(b) Paul Robinson is the one to blame for the deaths of the Bishop family.

Me, I'm not so easily convinced. I still think that the death of the mobster guy was too convenient and ridiculously unseen off-screen for it to be any kind of satisfying ending to such a meaty storyline. There is definitely more going on here, and the mobster was nothing more than a mislead.

I still hold with the theory I mentioned a few weeks back on MelbourneGirl's blog that the real killer's identity will be revealed (to us as the audience, if not to the other characters) in the closing episodes (or perhaps even the closing moments) of the year.

Gus? Darcy? Sindi? One of Paul's ex-wives? Who knows ...

But aren't you glad you asked??

At Wednesday, November 30, 2005 3:23:00 pm, Blogger Riss said...

Well done.

The sister's name is Katya.

Lyn and Joe haven't really called it quits - Joe's gone to "help a mate" run a big property so will be gone for a while (a year?) to help get it off the ground (it needs fencing).

I agree, I think that Ned's problem is illiteracy. Or dyslexia. Something like that anyway.

The mobster died from an overdose of a home-made poison (the stuff that was found on the letter that forced Izzy and Paul into hospital) so it does seem to be linked but, I agree, I don't think that they're finished with that particular storyline yet.

I did think that Darcy could be involved...

At Wednesday, November 30, 2005 10:58:00 pm, Blogger MelbourneGirl said...

thanks for the update bevis. but it was only ONE show we missed11 not a couple of weeks!! watched it tonight. so i think we really only missed the bit in prison when roo got in there.

i agree though about the bomb etc. that is one big red herring. i still think, as does princess, it's something to do with izzy, not paul...

ned's problem is illiteracy, but i think there's something else there as well. why would being illiterate stop him from kissing elle. no, there's something else. (princess agrees.)

At Thursday, December 01, 2005 9:00:00 am, Blogger BEVIS said...

I know, MG, but Elaine also asked what was going on, and although it's highly possible she was just trying to wind me up, I thought it was best to give a couple of weeks' worth of an update, especially seeing she's been overseas for a while now.

Either way, last night was a let-down, in the sense that they advertised it as Elle working out Ned's secret, but that's the point where the show ended - she didn't even have time to react / say anything before the credits rolled, so that hardly counts.

If Princess agrees that something else is at work in Ned's situation, I will humbly back away and agree. She is wise beyond her years and I am eager to read her guest post!

I think the real bomb-and-poisoned-letter-er used the poison to kill the mobster to get Paul & Izzy to relax and call off the cops and guards they had protecting them, thinking that the threat was over. It's clear that whoever-it-was framed the mobster because they knew he was the suspect - so that means it's someone who had access to (or could figure out for themselves) Paul's suspicions. Ooooh!!

I reckon it's Scott and Charlene.


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